Wednesday, December 27, 2006
Shadman presents this year in writing. For a review of the last 12 months go read my page. It is not good for me to rehash this all over. Had a gal ask me about my childhood and did not want to share a lot about it. It is the past and I am not going to go back there. Now my sis was online and still thinks iam not grown up... Oh well. But the past Why do we stay latched to it. Like I went from home to home to home. I had to relearn so many places and people when I was a kid and It still kind of drags on a man even this far into his life. I lost my mom at the age of 5 and went to 3 different homes. I cannot go to one of them they do not want to see me or talk to me. One foster home is open and that is the Hammes and they are like family to me. I love them just because they always loved me a ton and took love on me. Rolfes were a family I just never bonded well with. We always fought and I loved them and all that do not get me wrong. I miss them and I never write them or call them I guess because they rather me not.
To bring it to a lesson I guess the truth that God and Jesus are never going to leave is so important to me. I do find that is the Love I am looking for and I long for. I love my foster sis in Washington and I think about her but she is not always here with me and I need the constant love of Jesus. Perhaps this is one reason I am not open minded to others way because I just need the anchor in something that I know loves me. Jesus said he never leaves me or forsakes me and People I have had so much rejection in life that I am not looking for a new fad or a new way to find God. Churches that I think are worth it ought not reject the Lord or people. Jesus never does. If your teaching said that Jesus will reject a sinner in anyway I want you not to be on this site. I Love a Jesus that takes up a place in my heart and will never leave me even when I asked him to. And I have. I got so many people that might think I use Jesus as a thing like a crush and I do. I Got to keep Jesus first because I find nothing else that is going to keep me secure in this life and give me a home some soon day where rejection is gone. So Jesus never leaves you if your saved. Fight that out on comments but I am not going to fight you or spilt you because you think how you do. I went in 5 family's in 17 years and it is not easy.
To bring it to a lesson I guess the truth that God and Jesus are never going to leave is so important to me. I do find that is the Love I am looking for and I long for. I love my foster sis in Washington and I think about her but she is not always here with me and I need the constant love of Jesus. Perhaps this is one reason I am not open minded to others way because I just need the anchor in something that I know loves me. Jesus said he never leaves me or forsakes me and People I have had so much rejection in life that I am not looking for a new fad or a new way to find God. Churches that I think are worth it ought not reject the Lord or people. Jesus never does. If your teaching said that Jesus will reject a sinner in anyway I want you not to be on this site. I Love a Jesus that takes up a place in my heart and will never leave me even when I asked him to. And I have. I got so many people that might think I use Jesus as a thing like a crush and I do. I Got to keep Jesus first because I find nothing else that is going to keep me secure in this life and give me a home some soon day where rejection is gone. So Jesus never leaves you if your saved. Fight that out on comments but I am not going to fight you or spilt you because you think how you do. I went in 5 family's in 17 years and it is not easy.
